More race stuff...

A cool slideshow from the race on Sunday (it's short, but have your sound on for the full effect).

CA trip, closing thoughts...

Other than the marathon on Sunday, we enjoyed a couple of scenic drives along the coast and through some of the neighboring areas to Monterey during our trip to CA. We had our pre-marathon pasta dinner in nearby Pacific Grove on Saturday night. We tried to go out to Pebble Beach beforehand, but didn't want to pay the fee to even get through the guard station. After dinner, we headed back to Monterey via Ocean View Blvd. This was the first time that we got to see the water, and I was also dazzled by all the beautiful flowers everywhere. After a good post-marathon nap on Sunday, we went to Cannery Row for a delicious seafood dinner. We had a beautiful view of the bay from our table, and we were even treated to seeing a few dolphins below! Before heading back to San Jose on Monday afternoon, we repeated our drive down Ocean View Blvd. one last time, this time heading North back to downtown Pacific Grove. We finished our trip with a quick stop in Carmel, which definitely captured my fancy. I kept asking K who were the kind of people that actually lived in these amazing places. I would love to be one of them! The weather was perfect, and the scenery is just breathtaking. Pictures from our trip are here.

RW Quote of the Day...

I think this is particularly fitting for the moment:

"You have to forget your last marathon before you try another. Your mind can't know what's coming."
-Frank Shorterank Shorter

Big Sur: The Race Report....

Truth time. I shouldn't have ran today, maybe the half but definitely not the full marathon. I've alluded to my lack of running lately, but here's the full story. My last long run was on Feb. 18, 18 miles on the AT&T marathon course. Then, came the engagement and wedding planning, traveling, work went to hell, and shin pain. I only ran a handful of times at all since then. I mean it, you can count the number of times on both hands. But, we had already made our travel plans, and I had made a commitment so I found myself on the start line of the Big Sur marathon at 6:45 this morning. I can't remember if it was Sisson or my first marathon coach, Janie, who said this, but it has stuck with me...You have to respect the distance. If you don't, it will eat you alive. I obviously didn't, and I paid for it.

We were up at 3:30am and went to the bus pick-up location nearby in downtown Monterey. It was close enough that we could have walked, but K knew that the walk back to the hotel wouldn't feel quite so good after 26.2 miles so we drove (smart boy). We drove the course up Highway 1 to Big Sur. It was still dark, so we couldn't see the scenery, but you could definitely get a sense for the winding roads and all the up and down. It made me nervous as I realized that I was going to RUN back the way that we came. We arrived at the staging area at Big Sur Station about 5:45am where the mass of runners were eating, going to the bathroom, dropping off their gear, etc. We ran into a couple of women from Austin, who we recognized by their Decker and ARA 20-miler race shirts. We wished them well then made our way over to the start line.
I kissed K goodbye and headed up the road to line up according to projected finish time. They released white doves into the air then we were off. I started out very conservatively because I knew that I wasn't fully prepared for the challenge ahead. Thankfully, I didn't have any shin pain to contend with, so that was probably my saving grace. The day turned out to be much, much warmer than expected, and the heat wore on me as the day progressed. I enjoyed the first few miles through the large redwoods and other trees. We got our first glimpse of the coast at around mile 5. What a beautiful sight and remarkable change in scenery! I had stomach issues early on, so I took a rather long bathroom stop at this point. I definitely took in all the beauty of the course during the first half.
Miles 11-12 are a tough uphill climb to Hurricane Point. The Run from Hell had nothing on this course, by the way. At mile 13, you hit the famous Bixby Bridge and are greeted with the piano man once you cross.
At this point, I was still feeling relatively well. But, this was also the first time that I started to get worried about my time. The race officials enforced a cut-off of 5 hours at the 22-mile point. I got more concerned as my times per mile started increasing as I was forced to walk more in the later miles. I stopped enjoying the scenery and taking pictures. It became all about one foot in front of the other at that point. I loved these signs at mile 20, as they reminded me of the P*Dipps.
I knew that I was going to be cutting it super close to make the cut-off point in time. I was reminded of the Ironman in Kona when the later participants aren't allowed to proceed with the marathon because they didn't reach the cutoff in time. I knew how heartbreaking that would be to make it that far only to be pulled off the course, but there was also a part of me that didn't want to make it either because then at least I could stop. I made it to mile 22 and saw the buses waiting to take the unlucky participants behind me back to the finish. I soldiered on. Then, the concern was making it the finish before the official 6:00 hour mark. It was close, folks. But, I made it. I earned my precious medal.

The marathon breaks you down mentally, but also renews your spirit once you cross that beloved finish line. I had good patches and I had bad patches today. I paid the price for my lack of training, no doubt about it. I learned to respect the distance. I'll be back though...but not until October, 2009 for St. George.

Big K ran Big Sur pretty relaxed and easy, but he still ran it well for this course. He actually finished slightly ahead of Dean Karnazes and talked with him at the finish. I'm proud of him.

We're here!

It's been a long day already. The alarm clock went off at 4:30am, and we were out the door at 5:15 (well, actually 5:25 thanks to K). Our flight was slightly delayed out of Austin, but otherwise no major problems. We flew into San Jose and rented a car to drive to Monterey. It was a nice drive down the 101 and 1, and we arrived here about 10:45am (12:45pm CST). We hit the Expo to get our bibs, chips, goodie bags, and bus tickets then walked to a nearby restaurant for lunch because we were STARVING by that time. Afterwards, we went back to the Expo to catch Dean Karnazes, the famous ultrarunner, speak. I read his book, Ultramarathon Man, several years ago, and I have to admit that he presented a lot differently today than I was expecting. He comes across as somewhat conceited in his book, but he was suprisingly friendly and generous with his time today. We got a picture taken with him and I also got my book signed by him as well.

We finished looking through the Expo and picked up a few goodies from the marathon. We tried to check into our hotel early this afternoon, but our room wasn't ready yet. So, we headed back to the Expo to hear Bart Yasso from Runner's World talk about some of the unique races that he's done on all seven continents. He was a great speaker and shared some interesting stories about different races and places he's been to. We also stayed to hear a little bit from Jeff Galloway, mostly advocating for taking walk breaks.

So, now we're settling into our hotel room. It's 4:15pm, but really 6:15pm (CST) to my body. We're going to head out soon to have an early pasta dinner, then relax and possibly watch a DVD (we're staying at a cute little hotel by the way) before going to bed early. We have to be at the bus pick-up location in Monterey by 4:15am. We'll get bussed the 26 miles to the start in Big Sur then have to wait a bit there before the race starts at 6:45am. The weather should be fantastic, I think. My only goal is to finish before the course closes (6 hours), enjoy the beautiful course, take pictures, and have fun. NO time pressure whatsoever. I will walk, I will stop to take pictures, I will talk to the other participants. Thanks for the best wishes. Wish you were here! :)

Thursday already?

This week has flown by. I can't believe it's already Thursday evening. I can't believe I'm running a marathon in 3 days. Seriously.

Today was one of those days at work when I didn't even have a chance to go to the bathroom until 2:00pm, and I had to eat lunch while I was giving a presentation to my staff otherwise I wouldn't have had a chance to eat. Fortunately, I'm out of the office next week...Monday is a vacation day since we'll be coming back from California, and I'll be attending a conference here for the rest of the week. I can definitely use the break.

I'm looking forward to the return of Grey's Anatomy tonight! K is grilling chicken quarters for dinner (we'll see how they turn out for his first time), then I am going to the gym to do weights and swim. I'll finish off the night by watching my show when I get home.

TGIF tomorrow.

Oh, K...

After coming home from the gym tonight:

K said, "Want a cookie?" (as he munches on Chips Ahoy Candy Blasts cookies right next to me).

Me, "No!"

K asks, "Why not?"

Grrrrr.....

Then, he says, "Wanna watch me eat cookies?"

Me, "NOOOOOO!"

The end.

Tracking Boston...

I love that you are able to track the athletes today in real-time. Everyone seems to be doing well so far! Go Rogue!

I remember (fondly) tracking K when he ran Boston two years ago. We hadn't been dating that long at that point, but I think when he was away for that trip was the first time that I really realized I was falling in love with him. I was soooooo happy for him as I watched his splits come in that day, and I left him a message gushing how proud of him I was once he finished. :)

What's in store for me on Sunday...

Here's a great description of the marathon course.

Quiet Sunday...

It's been a pretty relaxed day. I got up early (for me on a Sunday) in order to watch the women's Olympic Marathon Trials...this resulted in me having to take a nap later in the afternoon. We met with a potential florist this afternoon. I LOVE flowers, that is easy to see by our home decor and my clothing. As we were going through the list of everything that would be needed, I started to get nervous about how much it's going to cost...because that's a lot of flowers everywhere! After our meeting, we had dinner at the Central Market on Lamar. We sat outside on the patio and relaxed. Then, we went to the gym for a quick workout. I did my regular weight routine and a short swim followed by a dip in the hot tub. The swim was just what I needed because I was sore from my run yesterday. Hopefully it will be a low-stress week ahead.

Good Saturday...

It's been a good, productive day.

I met Sadie at 8:00 this morning for a run. The weather was just perfect, so I was glad that I dragged myself out of bed to get out there. As always, I enjoyed the conversation along the way. I ran the Congress loop, while Sadie continued on from there (and, no, Sadie, I didn't walk the Congress bridge!).

Afterwards, I ran a few errands while K was out looking at tuxes with his best man. Apparently, they aren't accustomed to grooms coming in several months in advance of their wedding date. They're obviously not getting married to me! K got some ideas about styles for him, the wedding party, and our fathers.

Then, we went to get a price quote from another vendor for custom-made invitations. We also went to a couple of jewelers to look at wedding bands. So, all in all, we got everything accomplished that I wanted to for today. We're meeting with a florist tomorrow, but otherwise I think we'll be able to relax and enjoy the day. Yeah!

After a nap, we went to check out a sushi restaurant that we haven't been to before...Silhouette on Congress (across from the Paramount). Wow, it was delicious. And, not very expensive either. They only have a couple of non-sushi entrees so there isn't much of a selection for K, but he enjoyed what he got. We'll definitely go back.

Think good thoughts for K....

I posted last week that K's company announced layoffs for 10% of their workforce. Apparently, today is D-day. K slept fitfully last night. While I'm concerned about it, I'm not necessarily worried about it (this says a lot coming from a chronic worrier!). I know that whatever happens we will be okay. I truly believe that. Nevertheless, think good thoughts for K today...

**Update**: K still has a job.

Having a spare bedroom comes in handy on nights like last night...

I had another long day at work again yesterday, nearly 10 hours. When I finally made it home, we went to dinner at Circle C Cafe because we are considering having them cater the wedding and wanted to sample the fare before making a decision. To my surprise, it really wasn't a restaurant at all with seating, so we ordered our food and then sat outside at a picnic table to eat. The food was yummy, but I don't know that we're necessarily any closer to finalizing the caterer at this point. The ball is still in K's court on that.

After dinner, we stopped at Target so that I could pick up something for work. However, we proceeded to sit in the parking lot at Target for an hour having an argument about who does the dishes and other household chores. I'm not kidding. We've had this conversation several times before, which is part of the reason that I got so frustrated about K's attitudes again last night. I do not ascribe to the traditional division of labor, not that there is anything inherently wrong with it, but I do not think that it is an accurate framework for our relationship at this time or my personal ideals. Fact: We are a dual-career couple; we each have a full-time job. We each pay half of the household bills. As such, why should it automatically be my responsibility to take care of the majority of the household chores (e.g., laundry, washing dishes, cooking)? It shouldn't. Now, if I didn't work, then perhaps the traditional model would apply. But, I do work. I got my DOCTORATE for goodness sakes so that I could have a career that was fulfilling and so that I could be independent. My mom was a stay-at-home mom, and I know that part of the reason that I had such a great childhood was because of that, so I am not minimizing that path at all. She took me to/from school, ran me around to all my extracurricular activities, ran errands, cooked, cleaned, she did it all. I'm not saying that I won't choose that option if/when we have kids, but it is not the way that things are in our relationship right now. I work, just the same as K does. And, I want a partner who shares these other responsibilities with me because it is the caring thing to do.

Am I really running a marathon next weekend?

(from an email I just got regarding the race...)

With less than two weeks to go, we hope you have begun your "taper" and are ready to enjoy the marathon experience of a lifetime. Remember, Big Sur is not a PR course, but rather one to be savored and enjoyed. Look for the "Blue Jackets" at the finish...we will be there to congratulate you on your accomplishment!

May the wind be to your back...

The Big Sur Board and Staff

Progress...

Last weekend, I posted a list of what we've accomplished so far with the wedding and a to-do list of our next major tasks. I'm excited that we've made some progress with several things this weekend.

Bright and early yesterday morning, we met our photographer, who we received a free engagement session from as a door prize, at RunTex to get our pictures done. We walked down to the trail and stopped at several places along the way as we walked nearly all the way down to the Lamar bridge. We enjoyed ourselves over the course of the 2-hour session. K learned a new word, "schnoozle." And, the photographer and I noticed where K's eyes continued to end up because of his "downward" angle when looking at me. All in all, it was a fun time, and we're excited to see how all of the pictures turned out. Our friend, Natalie, even managed to get in on the fun when we were taking our last shot at the Annex.

I met Natalie and Holly a little while later for brunch at S. Congress Cafe. The strawberry mimosa's were fantastic! I had a delicious omelet to eat, too. It was a great way to start our afternoon of shopping for a wedding dress.

We started out at Unbridaled, "the cure for the uncommon bride." It's a small bridal boutique located in an old house on S. 1st with a very unique, South Austin feel. They had a great variety of styles (without being overwhelming) that were surprisingly affordable. I had no problem finding several that I liked at first glance to try on, and I'm happy to report that I found two dresses that I really liked so I'm just about certain that "the one" will be one of them. It was a great overall experience.

After Unbridaled, we were in good spirits as we went to David's Bridal so that Holly could try on the bridesmaid dress that I've had my eye on for a while now. It looked great on her, and I think it will look good on the rest of the bridal party too. I also picked out a shoe for them while we were there too. As we were leaving, I inquired about how long it would take for the dress to come in once the girls ordered it. The salesperson immediately raised my anxiety about it because some of the colors are back-ordered up to 20 weeks! When she told me that, I thought damn K for not choosing colors with me sooner! I think it will all work out though because I got the delivery time for several of the colors we were considering, and I made sure that K and I made a final decision about it last night.

We stopped at Whole Foods for a snack until my next appointment at Serendipity. Immediately when we walked in, I just didn't have the same feeling as I had at Unbridaled earlier. The dresses were definitely more formal and pricey than I was looking for. I only tried on 3 dresses, so it was a pretty quick trip. It's definitely for a certain kind of bride and a certain kind of wedding...definitely not for me.

It was a long day, so I took a nap with K when I got home. He made burgers for dinner, and we enjoyed a quiet evening at home last night.

We slept in late today. After lunch at Spicy Pickle (one of my favorite sub shops from Denver), we went to Paper Place to start getting ideas for our wedding invitations. As you might have guessed, I definitely didn't want anything too formal...my taste is more simple and modern. I think we're going to have them custom-made because it's so hard to find the exact style or colors I want in the books that we looked through to get ideas. We made a lot of preliminary decisions about it though.

Other things that we've made progress on are the cakes and possibly the reception music. So, we're feeling pretty good about things right now! Now, if K would just make a decision about the caterer....

Polygamy...

Have you heard about this?

I just got an email from the Texas Psychological Association to compile a list of providers who can possibly assist. It sounds like the need is great for those with experience working with children who have experienced trauma, so I submitted my info. I think they are currently being sheltered in San Angelo, so that would be a ways from here, but it would certainly be an interesting opportunity if called upon.

That puts my crappy work situation into perspective.

A new wrinkle...

As I was cooking a particularly yummy dinner tonight, K announced that his company will be laying off 10% of it's work force within the upcoming months. Obviously we're hoping that this doesn't affect K, but if it does then it certainly opens up some new doors in terms of changing jobs for me too. K did a cursory search of openings here in Austin and elsewhere, and the good news is that there does seem to be jobs out there (both in and out of the area) for him.

Weekend update...

I wish the weekend had turned out differently, but it was what it was.

After K got back from his run yesterday, we went to Torchy's for lunch. It was such a beautiful Austin spring day that obviously a lot of other people had the same idea to sit outside and enjoy some good food because it was packed. We tried the queso there for the first time, and it was yummy! After lunch, we went to RunTex because I still had the gift certificate that K gave me for Christmas to use for shoes. They were having a 20th anniversary sale, so I got $20 off my shoes. I've never really complained about it before, but does anybody else think it's outrageous to pay $130 for running shoes, especially when you go through a pair every 2-3 months? If I'm paying that much for shoes, then I think they should have wings or something on them!

Afterwards, I dropped K back off at the house so he could nap while I went out to find something to wear for our engagement pictures next weekend. I was happy with my purchase, but K apparently had a different opinion of it when I showed him. Hmph. Our Saturday evening consisted of watching basketball of course. I am so done with it by now. And, there's still one more game to go. Ugh.

We didn't do much of anything today. K had to work, so I did laundry, bought groceries, and did some other things around the house that needed to get done. We went to a cake tasting by a friend of K's this afternoon, but otherwise didn't accomplish anything on our wedding to-do list. I'm not happy about that either.

I'm bracing myself for another difficult week at work. I hope it gets better soon, but realistically I don't think it will.

I just entered the lottery for St. George, but I am hoping that I won't get in again this year in order to have a guaranteed entry next year via their "Third time is the charm" program. If I do get in though, it looks like I can still defer my entry to next year if I am among the first 500 people to cancel.

Finally, the week's over...

I'm waiting on K to get back from his 20-22 mile run this morning. Note that I am not there. More on that in a minute.

First though, K came pretty close to getting "the phone call" from me yesterday at work. I told him last Friday when all this really heated up that the day might come (sooner rather than later) where he gets a call from me saying that I couldn't do it anymore and quit. It was a really close call yesterday. If my direct supervisor had been there, then I think it would have happened. Obviously what's keeping me there is the practical side of needing a paycheck and benefits, but also that I really do enjoy this population and am just way too responsible and conscientious for my own good. I did "jokingly" tell my supervisor on Tuesday that I might quit, and obviously she freaked out and reminded me of how many people are depending on me there. Yes, I know and I'm not generally someone to walk away from my responsibilities. BUT, the flip side of this is that I am a good psychologist and this is not what I want or deserve in terms of the work environment. Getting my Ph.D. allowed me to have options. I don't have to live my life like this, and I need to do what is best for me in terms of taking care of myself.

So, obviously after another really stressful day, K knew just what I needed...Friday night out for dinner and a movie. It turned out to be just what the doctor needed. We had an early dinner at Hyde Park Bar & Grill then went to see "21." I thought the story was pretty interesting and it kept me engaged so it allowed my mind to completely shut off from work for 2 hours. Mission accomplished.

I haven't talked much about running (or my lack of it) lately. I know that doing the run this morning was critical, but I didn't do it. And, I know that I'm only hurting myself. It's going to just be me and the road on April 27, and I'm going to have to deal with all the demons for 26.2 miles. The thing is that I want to want to run again. I want running to be easy and enjoyable. I want to run pain-free. I want running to be my routine again. But, it's not any of that right now. And that makes me sad.

Obviously there's been a lot going on with the wedding planning, traveling, and work lately that I have allowed to interfere with running. In terms of the wedding planning, we haven't really moved forward with anything in several weeks. On Thursday, friends were asking about the various things that we've done so far, and that got me thinking about it (and, of course, all that still lies ahead). So, here's what we've gotten accomplished so far (in 1 1/2 months):

• Chosen the venue for the ceremony and reception
• Selected a date
• Made the guest list
  
• Mailed save-the-date cards
• Made an appointment with a photographer for our engagement session
• Developed a website for guests
• Reserved a block of hotel rooms for guests
• Booked a hotel for us on the wedding night
• Started our gift registry
  
• Selected the wedding party
• Chosen the bridesmaid dresses
  

And, that's it. Some of the critical things that we still need to do are:

• Choose a caterer and finalize the menu
• Select our colors
• Find a wedding dress
• Choose a florist
• Cakes
• Find someone to marry us
• Decide what we want for music during the ceremony and reception
• Select a photographer
  

There's much, much more to do beyond that. But, that's the next block of things that we're (supposed to be) working on. We have a couple of cake tastings scheduled for tomorrow, so maybe we'll be able to cross that one off the list soon.

Best part of the week...

Obviously, I've had a rough week at work. Although that hasn't improved, the bright spot of my week emerged tonight as the P*Dipp's gathered at Tara's house to celebrate our engagement. It was good to see our friends, some of whom we haven't seen in awhile. And, I appreciated folks coming together to share in our excitement.

One positive from the day...

Amongst all that made today difficult was one thing positive. I was asked to speak to a class of 2nd and 3rd year law students at UT about psychological testing, diagnosis, and other related issues. This is the sort of thing that I would ordinarily really enjoy, and I certainly did once I was there, but the timing of it wasn't ideal with everything else that has blown up over the past few days. I never really thought that teaching would be something that I would be interested in, but as I have gained more experience, I have found that I really enjoy sharing that with others. I have supervised Master's and Doctoral level psychology/counseling interns, and it is so rewarding to see them grow. I was blessed to have outstanding mentors and teachers throughout my life, and I know how important that is. I'd like to find a way to do more of that.

Running knows...

I have cheated on running.
Temptation has led me astray.
I have thought about calling the whole thing off.

I need a hot, sweaty make-up run...preferably before I run 26.2 miles on April 27.

Nothing left...

I got to work at 8:30am. I left work at 7:45pm. Do the math.

I finally had a chance to inhale something for lunch at about 2:30pm.

I wish I could say that tomorrow is a new day and it will be better. But, it won't.

I obviously missed our quality workout tonight. Even if I *chose* not to go, at least that would have been my decision.

Apparently it is too much for K to throw something in the microwave for dinner when I call to tell him that I am finally leaving work at 7:45 and will be home within minutes. Because I just had to throw the something in there myself.

I have no words left. I'm done.